Study 3: Trust
Proverbs 31:11. “Her husband can trust her and she will richly satisfy his needs.”
* Firm belief in the honesty, strength and character of a person.
* Confidence in a person.
* Reliance on the truth of a statement by a person.
* Responsibility arising from confidence in someone.
1. Trust is a gift, it gives new perspective on life’s problems. Romans 3:21-28.
2. Trust grows out of a reliance on God. Proverbs 3:1-8.
3. Trust causes us to count on God’s control and daily provision. 1 Peter 3:5,6.
4. Trust can be stronger by keeping in daily touch with God.
5. Trust almost always involves patience. Genesis 30:1-24.
6. Trust increases as we look back and count our blessings. Exodus 14:10-11.
Trusting God means, recognising firstly that God sees us as valuable. We need never fear personal threats or difficult trials. These can’t shake God’s love or dislodge His Spirit from within us, Romans 8:35-39. We need to show our trust in God by the way we stand up to wear, tear and abuse of everyday life. We can learn every day, how to apply the principles of the Word of God. We must be TOTALLY DEPENDANT on His Spirit for every action we take, in every area of our lives, however small we think it is, Zechariah 4:6.
Joseph in the Old Testament is an amazing example of someone who trusted God. Even when tempted to commit adultery, he refused and fled! His reward for obeying God was prison! But it was a season of training, which led to him being mightily used by God, to save a whole Nation, Genesis 39:7-20.
All men want a woman they can trust. “A worthy wife is her husband’s joy and crown; the other kind corrodes his strength and tears down everything he does”, Proverbs 12:4.
What person is on the look-out for a friend who tears them down?
We can destroy trust by doing certain things and having certain attitudes:-
1. Jokes that degrade a person, pulling them down in company.
2. Being sneaky, over money or time, or where we do not tell the truth.
3. Sharing a confidence that we have been trusted to keep.
4. Belittling our husband over the children, home or job.
5. Talking about other men in a suggestive way, and comparing them with our partner.
When we begin to believe in what our husband is doing, and encourage him, a trust can develop and he will change. Recognise and respect the fact that your husband is a part of your family – the head of the family. When you honour and respect him, you allow him to begin to learn how to head the household God’s way and then he will grow. Then you two, as a team, can talk and pray together about how to train the children, sort the finances etc: When we don’t develop a confidence and trust within our husband we actually open up the door for the devil to tempt him to do other things outside the home.
IT BEGINS WITH US AND A DESIRE TO CHANGE !!!
A big challenge for women is in the decision making process in our households, as we can be tempted to distrust our husbands’ /parents’ decisions. We have to believe the Word and put our trust in God. There may be times we feel our husband has made a wrong choice. That is when we take the Word and say, “Father I am submitting myself to my husband. I love my husband and I know he is a man of God, I trust You to be working in his life, and I submit to his decision”. This deals with the attitude of distrust. Remember, that submission doesn’t mean “I agree” but is your choice to allow your husband to be the head of his household – a letting go of the reins.
Many of us have spent years showing our husbands by our attitude and behaviour that his opinions are not valued or needed, acting as if we have an ‘honours degree’ in child rearing and home management. After several years of this he does not offer any help or advice and we cannot blame anyone else except ourselves. However, we can repent (turn) from this attitude, and ask our partner to forgive us. It’s important to talk together and pray about how to change the situation. Changes don’t happen overnight – so be patient! Keep going! Titus 2:5; Philippians 3:12-14.
Another area of distrust is the area of our dress. If we are dressing only to please our husbands then why are we “dressed to kill”? Our husbands need to know that we want to only please them. The joyful woman can be totally trusted by her husband even if she spends a lot of time in a man’s world.
What kind of relationships do you want to have with people? Do you want to be a strong, virtuous woman, someone that people will honour and esteem and trust? Or do you want to be a sneaky, lying woman that develops mistrust in your relationships?
Think about your relationships and challenge yourself with these questions:-
1) What have I been doing that would develop a lack of trust between my husband/child/friend and myself?
2) Have I been complaining, taking sides or been sneaky?
3) Have I been comparing my husband/ child/ friend with someone elses?
Stop and pray now. Repent (turn) and ask God to give you the Holy Spirit with His ability to be the wife/mother/friend that God wants you to be.
Learn to trust again.
It is so important for all who have been hurt at sometime and have learned not to trust, that they make a decision to trust again.
1. Forgive each person who has caused you not to trust, by a choice of the will, not your feelings.
2. Choose one person that you want to trust, and commit to love that person and consider their well-being above your own, 1 Corinthians 13:4-8. As you choose to die to your own needs and desires, you will find that even if that person were to let you down you would not take offence, as “dead” people do not get offended! Think of yourself as a corpse! It helps to picture ourselves in that way when we have to “die to ourselves daily,” 1 Corinthians 15:31.
3. Do not let hurting relationships from the past, cloud your vision of fantastic love-filled relationships for the future. Stop that dead ‘man’ from rising up!! Bury the past.
4. Above all, if you feel that God has let you down, or you do not understand why things have not gone according to your plan for your life, then do not hesitate to talk to God about it. Be honest and ask Him to give you the trust back. Take one Bible verse about your situation, and hold tight to it. Watch while God does what He says and builds up your ‘wall of trust’ in Him again, Proverbs 3:5-6.
Home Challenges for Joyful Woman 03
Read the notes about ‘trust’ and check the references.
1. What have you learned about trust from your own study and the notes?
2. What are you applying to your everyday life?
3. Do you feel you are a ‘people person’ who cares about others? If not how do you feel about people?
4. Who are you building up at the moment?
Read Proverbs 31:26; Galatians 6:2; Mark 1:41; 2 Corinthians 1:3-4; Hebrews 10:24-25; Proverbs 26:28
5. What do you think ‘encouragement’ is and what it is not?
What points are you good at?
6. Read Hebrews 3:13. Think of a family member who needs encouragement right now.
What would be the most encouraging thing you could do or say to them? DO IT TODAY.
7. Jesus encouraged people wherever He went. How can you follow His example?
8. Consider the type of encouragement you would like. Now give that encouragement to someone who the Holy Spirit shows you also needs it.
9. Why are some people more difficult to encourage than others?
Is it the way you give the encouragement? Or is it their inability to receive it?
God does not call us to see through people, but to see each other through.
10. In what way do you find it hard to give encouragement?
11. What do you find the hardest type of encouragement to receive?
12. Have you ever encouraged others for the wrong reasons? How did you put it right?
13. As you have encouraged others (even though your own situation has been very difficult), say how this has encouraged
14. What or who is the greatest discouragement in your life at the moment? Can this be changed? Pray now for God’s resolution.
15. If this cannot be changed, how can you ‘encourage yourself’ in the middle of the problem?
16. Are you, or God, carrying your discouraging situation? How can you let it go and leave it, where it belongs – with God?
17. Make a list of five things for which you can give God praise no matter how long your difficult situation continues.
18. Write a short testimony about a time when you were
19. Learn the memory verse. “And let us consider how we may spur one another on towards love and good deeds.” Hebrews 10:24.
Or learn. “And we urge you brothers, warn those who are idle, encourage the timid, help the weak, and be patient with everyone. Make sure that nobody pays back wrong for wrong, but always try to be kind to each other and to everyone else.” 1 Thessalonians 5:14,15.
20. Answer True or False to the following questions for Joyful Woman 03. If you can give verses from the Bible to back up your answer that will help you but only if you know them.